Insulted by Ebonics - Do you unknowingly stereo type other people?

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Permalink Reply by Robby Slaughter on July 7, 2009 at 8:33am

To me, this discussion is not about prejudice, but about the appropriate way to act.

The male nurse in Victoria's original story offended her through his manner of speech. Victoria seemed to feel it was presumptuous.

You seem to want to ensure that people do not pre-judge your preferred language (and other qualities) at first glance. Certainly this is something I think we all would like, not to be judged by our outward appearance.

However, if I hear two people speaking French, and I want to say hello---it would be more culturally appropriate to say "bonjour" than to interrupt them with "howdy." What should I do when I hear two people speaking in Ebonics?

Chris Flener asserts that Ebonics is not a language, but a sort of voluntary dialect. Perhaps the definition of this mode of speech is what guides the culturally appropriate action here.

Permalink Reply by Cissi Sherlock on July 7, 2009 at 10:32am

In this case, Chris is right, though I might question the use of voluntary.

I just think that is awfully funny that no-one has named the dailect that those in the Appalacian region uses. No one has name the New York accent anything other than the "New York Accent"

Why do we deserve a title and description?

Permalink Reply by Johnnie Firari on July 7, 2009 at 11:21am

You do not deserve a title or description for Ebonics. Looking at parts of this discussion it appears it is appropriate for only black people to speak. It only adds to the separation of race, which I think we should not be looking for additional ways to create separation.

A New York Accent is something that is hard to not have if you are from New York. It is also not race driven.

Permalink Reply by Cissi Sherlock on July 7, 2009 at 4:35pm

But what is African-American Language and do they speak it in Africa America. Where is Africa America and Caucasia?

(Even sounds stupid to me!!!)

There are more important things out there that foster tolerance in other people and their cultures. Everybody is not the same. But, just as God created flowers, especially the rose, Levey rose is not the same. There are different sizes, shape, colors and textures. But, they are all roses. And, so are we as people.

Permalink Reply by Cissi Sherlock on July 7, 2009 at 11:50am

I was just speaking to my fiance and he said James Brown said it best. He said, I am just an American!"

Permalink Reply by Cissi Sherlock on July 7, 2009 at 12:37pm

Nicki, is that a question for Chris?

Permalink Reply by Nicki Laycoax on July 7, 2009 at 12:40pm

The music question? Yep...

Permalink Reply by Victoria Finch on July 7, 2009 at 6:32pm

This has been a very spirited discussion. We should learn to celebrate our differences and discover our commonalities. We are all uniquely and beautifully made by our creator.

...... Protection
For Gangs, Clubs
And Nations
Causing Grief In
Human Relations
It's A Turf War
On A Global Scale
I'd Rather Hear Both Sides
Of The Tale
See, It's Not About Races
Just Places
Faces
Where Your Blood
Comes From
Is Where Your Space Is
I've Seen The LIGHT
Get Duller
I'm Not Going To Spend
My Life Being A Color
It doesn't matter if you're black or white Michael Jackson.

This discussion will close at noon tomorrow.

Permalink Reply by Carla Feagans on July 7, 2009 at 11:32pm

This is obviously a subject that people can get quite emotional about.

I think there is one issue of language and another of stereotypes. In my linguistics course in college (at IU - where, incidentally, I was in the Afro-American Dance Company, even though I am white), we studied languages - the original "proper" language (English or otherwise), as well as dialects, slang, vernacular, etc. Ebonics was one of many things we studied - language as it is used, not what one or another group dictates is "right". That's not a discussion I wish to get into, nor what (I think) the original question was asking.

As far as people making assumptions based on initial appearance, I think most of us strive NOT to pre-judge - but, as the question says - "unknowingly" stereotyping happens whether we want to admit to it or not. I grew up living overseas as well as the U.S., so I try really hard not to pre-judge anyone. But does it happen? Yes, it does. Do I treat people differently? I try not to. I don't talk to anyone differently based on race, sex, culture (unless they don't speak English at all, then I try to simplify my language or use theirs if I know it - but this does not apply to Ebonics). But, I will admit, just the other day, there was a dirty, possibly homeless, and possibly mentally disabled person walking past me on the street. I'd like to be exactly the same with that person as with anyone else I might cross paths with, but every fiber of my being was hoping he'd just pass me by - and he did. I'm not proud of that, but, I did unintentionally stereotype that person.

I do try to give a lot of grace to people because I know sometimes they mean well, even if it's inappropriate. I am not easily offended, b/c I tend to give most people the benefit of the doubt. I can understand why you were offended, but at the same time, he (the nurse) might have just been trying to be nice and not understood how inappropriate that was.

It IS interesting to me that some people get highly offended by something when others may not - is the responsibility on the offendee, the offender or both? My answer I guess is that it partly depends on what is being said and how it is said, and the intent behind it. As a triplet mom, I found it interesting that many other triplet families were insulted by those who made comments (good or bad) or wanted to take pictures of the baby triplets (believe me, it's quite an experience to try to go anywhere with infant triplets!). Most people were just trying to be nice but didn't know what to say, and/or were truly amazed by seeing triplets. I tended not to take offense (unless they were downright rude, which some were). But other triplet moms got VERY upset or angry, very offended, even by someone taking pictures or saying something nice. Some even had t-shirts printed up saying "We are a family, not a freak show!"

Permalink Reply by Arik Flanders on July 8, 2009 at 7:37am

I don't address African Americans any different than I address anyone else. Nor should they me. You've got to look at the picture from both angles. African Americans can just as easily address Caucasians, Asians, Italians, etc the same way they do their friends. Does that make it right? No, but in all reality I could care less either way as long as know one is purposely disrespecting me.

Permalink Reply by Cissi Sherlock on July 8, 2009 at 2:17pm

You go, guy!

Permalink Reply by Shawn Quick-Raflik on July 8, 2009 at 10:19am

What a discussion you started, Victoria! I had not seen this thread until you told me about it on the phone this morning. I use the term "Girl" to all females (I said it to you on the phone this morning - which is really funny now that I have seen this thread) I also use the term "Miss" to all females. Example: If I was greeting a female that I know, I could say, "Good Morning, Miss Victoria". And I hope that I don't offend anyone when I use these terms.

I think because you were in a professional setting and a man that you didn't know used this term, it felt offensive. He was probably trying to put you at ease and establish a rapport. Sadly, he failed because you were offended.

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