Ways to deal with negative co-workers!

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Permalink Reply by Erik Deckers on March 13, 2008 at 11:22pm

I dealt with this more than a few times. I tried to let my success speak for itself, and keep out of the way of the people nipping at my heels. Luckily, I made enough friends and was respected enough that the jealous people were not able to do me any lasting harm. But it gets annoying. Whatever you do, avoid snapping back. Take the high road, and you'll be respected for it in the long run.

The best way to deal with it is to be a solid performer with a lot of good and smart people in your corner. If you're a loner, arrogant, and believe you can do it all yourself, you're on shaky ground.

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Permalink Reply by Bonnie Benshoof on March 14, 2008 at 10:09am

Good advice!! No, so far never snap back, I'm calm,cool and collective! I like the part about hanging out with good, smart people, fortunately I have those around me including smi!! Thanks!

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Permalink Reply by Maureen Williams on March 14, 2008 at 9:22am

You know how to tell the trailblazers don't you?

They're the ones with the arrows in their chests!

People that choose to take shots (different from constructive feedback) will drain your energy if you choose to pay attention to it.

Stay postive, be who you are.

If negativity begins to completely destroy anything you try to do, it's time to make some changes in where you are and who your are with or both.

That's been my experience anyway. Know when to hold 'em,know when to fold 'em.

Maureen

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Permalink Reply by Bonnie Benshoof on March 14, 2008 at 10:12am

I agree, it may be time to stay away from the negativity!! Good suggestion!

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Permalink Reply by Doug Theis on March 14, 2008 at 10:39am

Being positive takes effort. It means you have to constantly leave your comfort zone.

Being negative takes almost no effort. Many negative people espouse the negative opinions and feelings of others (what they read in the newspaper, what they see on TV). No effort is required; just repeat the downer thoughts you recently read or heard. These days, just reading the newspaper and watching the news have become negativity immersion therapy sessions. I think it's wise to avoid these and replace them with more constructive endeavors.

I totally agree with Maureen about avoiding negative people; willful or not, their behaviors will tend to drag you down.

Jeffrey Gitomer's Little Gold Book of Yes! Attitude is a great source for both positive thinking and how to manage negativity. One point he makes in the book really hit me where it hurt. His point: resign your position as chairman of the universe. Don't try to take on other people's problems until you've solved all of your own. Ouch. But it's great advice that I work daily to implement.

Finally, I am a firm believe in Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice what can adequately be explained by stupidity.

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Permalink Reply by Bonnie Benshoof on March 14, 2008 at 11:16am

Excellent advice will do, and with these people, you hit it on the Nail it is Stupidity!

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Permalink Reply by Rob on March 14, 2008 at 10:33am

IMNSHO, the best thing to do is to stay above the fray... don't get into gossiping, bickering, whatever. Be the bigger person.

The other thing I do is be overly polite to them... Then they're being crappy to you and you're not reciprocating... makes them look incredibly petty.

Most importantly.... have a thick skin.

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Permalink Reply by Bonnie Benshoof on March 14, 2008 at 11:10am

O.k. that is pretty much what I do, so good to know I'm on the right track.Thanks

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Permalink Reply by Rhett N. Cochran on March 14, 2008 at 11:31am

Of course, if any of this fails, you can just make fun of them. That works for me. Make people laugh at themselves. We're all ridiculous. It's just a matter of to what degree.

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Permalink Reply by Andrew Ball on March 14, 2008 at 11:35am

Things my mother used to say:
If you can't laugh at yourself, you can't laugh at anyone else.
It takes more muscles to frown than to smile.

All trite but true. (I hate sounding like my parents!)

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Permalink Reply by Maureen Williams on March 14, 2008 at 11:41am

Snaps to your mom Andrew!

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Permalink Reply by Ben McCann on March 14, 2008 at 11:31am

Good Stuff everyone... especially your comments Doug... It is hard work being so positive all the time. That is why we need to surround ourselves with Positive people who build your energy vs. drain it. I thank God I have you Smoosiers in my life... most of you are the best of the best. keep up the good work.

Moreover, I find that people who are self focued and self absorbed are not people that I want to be around, but those that are truly looking and serve a purpose higher than themselves are the best people to be part of your inner circle.

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